I feel like this applies to dating within any racial/ethnic category that has experienced oppression—and I want to thank you for articulating it just now.
I’ve faced this within the Jewish community. A lot of Jewish men fear Jewish women because we remind them of their own historical humiliation and trauma, which we as a community and them as a group really have done way less work to face than Black men have.
Because of this hate, they treat Jewish women like crap. They expect us to be their redeeming Angel who cures them of their historical pain, and when we obviously can’t, they lash out.
And because of historical sexism going back millennia, they usually get away with it.
When we women try to fight back, bad shit happens.
Dating outside the community is not necessarily the answer.
But to be honest. I’d like to not feel hated for a while.