I keep noticing that when I gain self-esteem and start to carry myself with more self-love, men are drawn to me...but that doesn't mean I want them. It also doesn't mean that they're good for me or have much to offer me in return. Instead, the kinds of men who are drawn to me are men seeking a mom, seeking the resources I have, treating me like land that has not yet been claimed. There's not a dance of energies happening; they see me as an inert, inanimate object, someone who won't fight them when they try to get what they want from me. When I object to this characterization, or fight back against their projections, they get very angry.

This entire dynamic has nothing in common with a real relationship because there is no real connecting happening.