I think I don’t want to be in a relationship but I still want some attention and flirtation from men. I think there’s this really intense cultural expectation that every attraction needs to lead to a romance, or that we should pursue it, regardless of whether we feel up to it mentally or physically. Learning to say no to relationships I’m not ready for has shown me how often people come at me ready to start romances that are bound To end badly because they’re not ready any more than me.