I think that sexualization as a source of pleasure really can't exist with rape culture. As long as women are silently doing calculus about whether or not our actions are going to lead to being slut-shamed or blamed for being raped later on, we're not going to be free to enjoy our sexuality. As long as our male partners totally opt out of allyship to keep us safe from sexual violence, and actively avoid engaging with us in discussions of sexual violence we have experienced in the past, sex is always going to feel coerced rather than free and joyful.