I'm going to go out on a limb here but based on my own personal experience, for at least some people, poly serves as a really specific maturation moment (that some people never grow out of). You know that moment in early adolescence when everyone is pairing up, so you want to do that too, but you also want to flirt with everyone you meet because everyone seems soooo hot and your hormones are soooo intense and you have basically no boundaries yet and when people like you it's over the top overwhelming and when they reject you then you can barely stand up after? I feel like I encounter a lot of that in the poly 'scene.' People who want a partner to have a partner, so they have someone to do partner things with and play house with, but also need all the validation, and want all the sex, and really have no clue what to do with any real feeling or deep connection if it comes.

It's fun sometimes to play around with people like this, because they're like golden retrievers, desperate to please and always eager to play.

But they make terrible partners. Because they're like golden retrievers. They can't be alone.

I learned that the hard way.