I'm not really sure where you're coming from on this. It seems like you know a lot of people who take terrible care of themselves? Because what I see all around me are QTPOC women, marginalized women, people who have been treated like shit our entire lives, trying our damnest to take care of ourselves in a culture that teaches us we are worthless. What I see are marginalized people who are violated in countless ways, still fighting for self-care.

So maybe what you mean is, you see a lot of people not trying, because it's hard for you to try.

But people like me fight our entire lives to take ourselves seriously and treat ourselves well in spite of endless forces stacked against us, including capitalism's machinations.

Maybe you and your community just need to be stronger. Maybe you need to learn to step back and listen to people who understand how to do this better than you.

I appreciate that you're trying to be an ally, but what is actually happening in your response is, you have centered your own experience and are treating it as "The Norm" or "The Absolute truth" in this society with its multiplicity of experiences.

I find that people tend to treat ourselves in a way that reflects how we feel about ourselves.

If you feel lousy about yourself and that's what you see around you, there are ways you can change.