I've found that the fear of "bigness" has as much to do with behavior as it does with body type. Too many men want women who only eat real food as a performance for their pleasure, or during dates they pay for; they want women who speak up, but only if it's to talk about subjects they care about, and never to call out their actual behavior. They want women who fit into a very specific, very limited space that they've created in their lives, the space that best serves themselves.

They want women who don't want. Fatness is an overt manifestation of the idea that we hold desires they know nothing about and have no control over.