So one thing that I really want to highlight is the concept of community care.
Your actions might be morally acceptable to you, but if they hurt others consistently, do you still think they’re ok?
Or do you just feel helpless to change?
In the context of the miniseries, while Martha’s behavior was not his responsibility, his behavior was.
And his behavior included essentially pretending to be interested in her to get an ego boost.
Because taking someone out on dates, even “pity dates,” is enacting interest.
We don’t actually tend to date people we’re not interested in, or masturbate to them, or obsess over them.
What we do instead is tell ourselves we’re better than them because the attraction embarrasses us.