There is indeed 'quiet BPD.' That's what I thought I had for a long time. But when I started dealing with my autism and treating my BPD more like a combination of trauma and an attachment disorder, I started to heal, really heal, rather than just manage symptoms. I think the best way to understand any personality disorder is, a thing that we develop around wounds we think cannot be healed, or wounds we believe we deserve.

Personality disorders were understood and created by primarily cis white guys trying to determine disorders so they could communicate with insurance companies, not because they wanted to help people feel better.

I think that's really important to know.